joy | Designing 31

when life hands you {crazy}

Right about one year ago I wrote this post… but it never got published. It was raw. It was typed out in frustration.

But when I came across it yesterday, all I could see was that it was REAL… authentic feelings that I now know many moms feel.

And it’s not a sin to BE frustrated-only to allow it to control you.

The ages and such are a little different now, but the truth still applies… a whole year later:

…when life hands you crazy:

I know many families with more than 4 children who seem to really have it all together.

And I know families with less than 4 children who seem to, well, NOT have it all together.

Me? OH! Our family has 4 children… and definitely do NOT have it all together!

thanksgiving.

{but together, we have it all :)}

But, on occasion, we give the illusion that it’s all dandy. [hehe]

I have found that life just dishes out crazy… like there’s not tomorrow! {and there may not be}

So what’s a girl to do when the crazy just keeps coming?

The answer might sound difficult, but it’s really just a mindset:

EMBRACE IT.

Welcome crazy to just come and have a seat right next to you!

Crazy comes

and your baby has an outfit-dirtying-blowout 5 minutes before you are supposed to leave for school… go ahead and cry. We’ve all been there!

Crazy comes

and your already-trained-toddler wets herself in the bathroom… at church…

Crazy comes

and your 3rd grader reminds you of her project that was not finished but is due… today.
Apologize after you loose it, and take a few moments to remind her of her own responsibility… and that childhood is the time to learn it.

Crazy comes

when your baby breaks out in hives caused by an allergic reaction to his meds…

…and your 5 year old breaks out in something… caused by a-still-unknown-source…

…and your husband’s asthma [which has been very mild for years] starts acting up daily and your heart is terrified of the struggle to breathe…

…and you have friends and far-away-family struggling with things that make a soul yearn for the Lord to just return and take us all away…

And then you remember there are those who are not yet ready for that.

And so, crazy strikes yet again and you realize that life is going on… for now… and HOW DO YOU LIVE WITH CRAZY?

oh, right… EMBRACE it.

The days I handle the crazy the best are the days I wake up and struggle to get out of bed... And my 5 year old gets up in a grumpy-funk, and I snap at her at 6:35 am…..

and I see the hurt in her face, in the face of her older sister sitting there listening to it…

and the Lord catches me in my fall.

I realize crazy has come yet another day into my home.

I stop.

I hug that 5 year old squirming her grumps away.

And I whisper a prayer that sounds something like… “oh God, please help me!”

I speak an apology to my babies and coax some laughter out of their little bodies.

because those are the days I am forced to keep muttering… “Lord, make me love with your love and make me speak with your words and make me touch with your embrace…” all day long.

kids2

Right about one year ago I wrote this post… but it never got published. It was raw. It was typed out in frustration.

But when I came across it yesterday, all I could see was that it was REAL… authentic feelings that I now know many moms feel.

And it’s not a sin to BE frustrated-only to allow it to control you.

The ages and such are a little different now, but the truth still applies… a whole year later:

…when life hands you crazy:

I know many families with more than 4 children who seem to really have it all together.

And I know families with less than 4 children who seem to, well, NOT have it all together.

Me? OH! Our family has 4 children… and definitely do NOT have it all together!

thanksgiving.

{but together, we have it all :)}

But, on occasion, we give the illusion that it’s all dandy. [hehe]

I have found that life just dishes out crazy… like there’s not tomorrow! {and there may not be}

So what’s a girl to do when the crazy just keeps coming?

The answer might sound difficult, but it’s really just a mindset:

EMBRACE IT.

Welcome crazy to just come and have a seat right next to you!

Crazy comes

and your baby has an outfit-dirtying-blowout 5 minutes before you are supposed to leave for school… go ahead and cry. We’ve all been there!

Crazy comes

and your already-trained-toddler wets herself in the bathroom… at church…

Crazy comes

when your baby breaks out in hives caused by an allergic reaction to his meds…

…and your 5 year old breaks out in something… caused by a-still-unknown-source…

…and your husband’s asthma [which has been very mild for years] starts acting up daily and your heart is terrified of the struggle to breathe…

…and you have friends and far-away-family struggling with things that make a soul yearn for the Lord to just return and take us all away…

And then you remember there are those who are not yet ready for that.

And so, crazy strikes yet again and you realize that life is going on… for now… and HOW DO YOU LIVE WITH CRAZY?

oh, right… EMBRACE it.

The days I handle the crazy the best are the days I wake up and struggle to get out of bed... And my 5 year old gets up in a grumpy-funk, and I snap at her at 6:35 am…..

and I see the hurt in her face, in the face of her older sister sitting there listening to it…

and the Lord catches me in my fall.

I realize crazy has come yet another day into my home.

I stop.

I hug that 5 year old squirming her grumps away.

And I whisper a prayer that sounds something like… “oh God, please help me!”

I speak an apology to my babies and coax some laughter out of their little bodies.

because those are the days I am forced to keep muttering… “Lord, make me love with your love and make me speak with your words and make me touch with your embrace…” all day long.

kids2

signature

there is a man who loves me

by tascha | 4 comments

there is a man who loves me

I strayed… He called out.

I left… and He pursued.

I stole… and He forgave.

I lashed out… and He embraced.

I trembled, knowing my nakedness… and He draped a Royal Robe.

Now I love Him… because He first loved me.

{this is the Love Story of Calvary} and it can belong to ANYONE!

Have a Blessed Valentine’s day… {edited: or Resurrection Celebration!!}

and be sure to let those you love know it!

I strayed… He called out.

I left… and He pursued.

I stole… and He forgave.

I lashed out… and He embraced.

I trembled, knowing my nakedness… and He draped a Royal Robe.

Now I love Him… because He first loved me.

{this is the Love Story of Calvary} and it can belong to ANYONE!

Have a Blessed Valentine’s day… {edited: or Resurrection Celebration!!}

and be sure to let those you love know it!

signature

comfort in FOLLOWING…

by tascha

This beautiful song, over a century old, still proclaims such truth! The melody is soothing, and I enjoyed hearing our song leader sing this as the special music last night!

When God is leading… then I am following. The comfort that a child has knowing that the parent will do them no harm is the same comfort I can have when truly following God’s leading me along!

I found a beautifully sung version on youtube to share…

God Leads Us Along

1 In shady, green pastures, so rich and so sweet.

God leads His dear children along;

Where the water’s cool flow bathes the weary one’s feet,

God leads His dear children along.

2 Sometimes on the mount where the sun shines so bright,

God leads His dear children along;

Sometimes in the valley, in darkest of night,

God leads His dear children along.

3 Tho’ sorrows befall us, and Satan oppose,

God leads His dear children along;

Through grace we can conquer, defeat all our foes,

God leads His dear children along.

4 Away from the mire, and away from the clay,

God leads His dear children along;

Away up in glory, eternity’s day,

God leads His dear children along.

Chorus

Some thro’ the water, some thro’ the flood,

Some thro’ the fire, but all thro’ the blood;

Some thro’ great sorrow, but God gives a song,

In the night season and all the day long.

chaos ensues

by tascha

Illness has invaded our home. In the wake of Mommy being laid up… chaos ensues. Mini bodies are clothed and fed. I am praising my Lord for a dishwasher! But toys are scattered. Crumbs get smaller with each passage of pitter-patter through the house.

For the rest of the week everything will be washed with hot water and tea tree oil to kill some germs!

But what about the spirit that aches? -the Mommy-heart that hurts over canceled activities and a less-than-compassionate attitude that can take over when a body just feels… iiiuhhh.

While yet taking a break from typing this, as most posts take several “sit sessions” to complete, I rested, made yet another meal, and kept repeating… “what did you say?” over. and. over. and. over. and not always in a pleasant manner. {my ears a horribly stopped up}

While medicine and sleep can {usually} take care of the body, who or what can takes care of my soul?

Hear, O LORD, and have mercy upon me: LORD, be thou my helper. Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing…girded me with gladness…to the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever. Psalms 30:10-12

The Lord takes care of my soul. His mercies are new every. single. day. And they fail not. I ask for His joy… He makes my mourning to dance and lifts me with gladness.

When I allow a merry heart to take over {it does good like a medicine, you know}, or… as sometimes happens… I look for a merry heart, I begin to have my spirits raised and while my body still aches, my soul is lighter, happier… my face can have a smile amid cracked lips and a sinus pressure headache.

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Proverbs 17:22

Some days all I need to find a merry heart is to STOP. and look at and listen to my children. With 4 around, someone is bound to be bringing amusement. I take an active role in playing with them, asking what they are playing… and that has yet to not lift my spirits.

Other days I think through our church members, browse my facebook friends for those who do not post very frequently…and look. actively seek out. someone who needs my prayer, or maybe a note. When I get outside of myself, I find a solace for my soul that is not there when I am focusing on me… even on my blessings.

So, while my body is still struggling {contemplating a doctor visit :(}, my soul has become lighter, healthier, more peaceful… because Jesus is said to be the Great Physician… and sometimes my soul needs more healing than my ill body.

remembering….

by tascha | 2 comments

{This was copied by permission from a friend… He captured well the essence of Misty’s spirit-reminding me of what MY goal should be. She was a friend. Today marks 13 years since this crash that claimed 2 lives and injured 3 others, and I pray these thoughts are an encouragement to someone–to keep on… or to get back on the right path!}

~~~~~

According to my earnest expectation and my hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but that with all boldness as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it by by life or by death. For to me to live is Christ and to die is gain. [Philippians 1:20]

I met her for the first time at 7:00 a.m. on the back porch of the college bookstore. I found it a great place to go before class each morning to read and pray, watching the sun rise over the East Tennessee hills.

Misty had come to the same conclusion apparently, as I turned the corner and saw her sitting there watching the sun rise. “I was just leaving,” she said as she rose to go.

“Take your time,” I replied.

As the months passed, I came to know her well. She was somehow different than many of my other college friends. There was something about her that glowed inwardly. I came to realize that Misty Carrier had a walk with the Lord Jesus Christ unmatched by anyone her age I had ever met before.

She was just 21 years old. I know personally that she spend hours in prayer and personal Bible study each week, in spite of a heavy class load. She was a soul-winner and had and inner passion that set her soul afire for the lost.

I often wondered what great work God had in store for her life. Her parents were missionaries in Papua New Guinea, and she spoke often of their work there. The conversations we had were not the normal chitchat of college friends but were deeper and more thoughtful. She spoke with a passion of wanting to be such an instrument of Christ so as to be controlled each moment of every day by His divine hand.

Her life verse is given above, and it was her guiding light. She wanted to magnify Christ, no matter what that meant. She had few close friends, but none so close as her precious Savior, for whom she longed to be ever closer. She would pray, “Lord, if you can use my life to save some soul today, take it. I just want to be close to you.”

In September of 1999, the Lord took her up on her offer.

Just a few hundred yards from her dormitory, she was pulling her car onto the road one evening and was struck by a drunk driver.

He walked away.

She did not.

Standing over her casket at the funeral, her grandfather she loved so dearly, announced with tear filled eyes that he had finally accepted Christ as Savior.

The cost? Misty’s life.

Though we may ponder the value of the trade, Misty did not.

Though we may question the judgement of the Lord, she saw only the outcome: Christ shall be magnified.

In James 4:14, the Bible asks this question, “What is your life?”

For Misty Carrier, the answer was simple. For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I received these words in an email about 10 years ago. They struck me, and I contemplated them.

After printing it, the page stayed in my Bible for years, along with a hand-penned note from my dad… about how he was proud of me.

After a while, neither was safe where little hands could reach {since they routinely fell out of the pages :)}… so they are both tucked away, safely. But I read them often.

Their words inspire me to live so that

1. others will remember Jesus when I’m gone…

2. those who have invested in my life will be proud to have done so.

« Older Entries